RAP

by Sally Brotman

Lois and Helen

Lois and Helen

We're all kvellen

For Lois and Helen.

Time for the wedding bells

Listen to them CHIming

Time to be CELebrating

That's why I'm RHYming.

Who could IMAgine

A day like today!

Helen and Lois

It makes us ALL gay

In a manner of speaking

If you're getting my drift

We're having a party and

Feeling the lift

Of love in the air

So don't clip my wings

Let's hear it for the brides

Why, even Niki sings.

So what if it HAPpens to be

Mairsy Doats

WhatEVER it takes

To float your boats.

We have a lot of folks

Here WITH us today

Who GOT themselves married

In the old-fashioned way

And a lot of other folks

Took a slightly different route

By GOING to the court house

And bringing a suit

But NOT the kind of suit

To put on and wear

More like the other kind

That's feeling like hair

But if the suit fits,

Or maybe it's the shoe

Well, THEN the marriage license

Is legal and true.

With Hillary and Julie

There was no foot-draggin’

Those Goodridge folks went

And fixed our wagon.

While Mary Jane and Connie

Are doing just fine

Since they made it to the UU

Church on time.

It sounds like a racquet

But it's legal all right

Louise and Jane

Play doubles all right.

It sure wasn't easy

And it sure wasn't quick

That son of a Mormon

Has been a prick.

Who cares if the gov'nor

Don't like it one bit

We all know the guy

Is a big crock of it.

I know what you were thinking

But I wasn't gonna swear

I've gotta' watch my mouth

'Cause a Patriot might be near.

And I DON'T mean a Patriot

On the frozen gridiron

At GEFILTEFISH stadium

With pigskins flying

It's those half-time pundits

Who place all the blame

On a costume malfunction

Hey, what's in a name?

Those dudes down in Washington

Taping what you say

They call themselves Patriots

While locking folks away?

If you say a naughty word

Or they think your values suck

Or you stand up for your rights

Or you try to make a ruck-us

We've all been BUSHwacked

Politicians missed their calling

Born once, or born twice

They still NEED an overhauling.

So I've got a suggestion

And the neo-cons should grab it.

There are lots of empty closets

That I think they should inhabit.

But now is not the time

For a Bush-bashing roast.

With a little bit of luck

Those guys will soon be toast.

So LET'S have a toast

For the gals of the day.

Lois and Helen

Be happy and gay

Getting it together

Feeling oh so proud

Saying I DO

And saying it loud.